Christmas Movies! SANTA CLAUS CONQUERS da MARTIANS- NO!!!

"Hey Andy-- you did a list of Halloween movies, how about one for Christmas?"

Well, the problem here is that my movie collection is virtually the Halloween section of your local Best Buy (are they still in business?).  What do I think about Tim Allen's THE SANTA CLAUS or NATIONAL LAMPOONS CHRISTMAS VACATION?  I don't think anything-- I haven't seen 'em and I'm not going to.  So its a tough request.

But okay, I'll give it a shot-- a quick day by day countdown of five Christmas films I'd recommend and even one or two I wouldn't-- it goes without saying that ANYTHING put out by the Lifetime or Hallmark Channels would make my list of NEVER SEE films, but one that really strikes my fancy as being so bad it's UNWATCHABLE is...

SANTA CLAUS CONQUERS THE MARTIANS couldn't even be saved by the gang at Mystery Science Theater 3000 and don't think they didn't try.  I think they tried twice and both were failures.  This awful mismatch of ideas can't decide if its trying to be a campy classic or a charming kids classic and what it is simply is unwatchable and boring tripe.

You can put makeup and a wig on a turd and it doesn't scream out for you to take it out on the town, and despite the ENDLESS DVD releases of this dreadful film each trying a different take on the cover art it's an absolute loser from start to finish.

So what DO I like for Xmas movies?
Come back tomorrow.